KOMMONSENTSJANE- COLUMNIST WONDERS HOW FAR OFF HIS FICTITIOUS JAN. 6 HEARING MIGHT REALLY BE?

I wish Google would stop erasing my tag. Thank you for the moment of silence by Google after making that statement by turning my site’s lights out and then returning.

An IQ TEST IS IN ORDER FOR THIS COMMITTEE! An idle flat mind is the Devil’s workshop.

*****


Did you vote for this turn coat, Liz? Better luck next time. Mouth aghast.

The Columbus Dispatch

6/26/2022


Joe Blundo: Columnist wonders how far off his fictitious Jan. 6 hearing might really be?

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Rep. Liz Cheney, R-Wyo., vice chair of the House Select Committee investigating the Jan. 6 U.S. Capitol insurrection, with Chairman Bennie Thompson, D-Miss., at left.


© J. Scott Applewhite, AP
Rep. Liz Cheney, R-Wyo., vice chair of the House Select Committee investigating the Jan. 6 U.S. Capitol insurrection, with Chairman Bennie Thompson, D-Miss., at left.
Welcome to yet another hearing of the House Select Committee to Investigate the Jan. 6 Attack on the United States Capitol, featuring one new witness, plus our favorite characters from past episodes.

Here’s the chairman, Rep. Bennie Thompson of Mississippi.

Thompson: This is our 167th day of testimony and we still can’t believe what we’re hearing. Nevertheless, let’s welcome today’s first witness, Rudy Giuliani.

Thompson: Popular demand. Our polling indicates that of all the people who surrounded President Trump after he lost the election, you are the favorite of comedians around the world. Now, I want to ask: How intoxicated were you on election night 2020?

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Giuliani: The president found me highly intoxicating. Beyond that, I invoke my Fifth Amendment rights against self-incrimination.

Thompson: Very well, then, the committee will now hear testimony from our new witness, the director of the White House Office of Presidential Pardons and Responsibility Avoidance, Ms. Mia Non Culpa. Please tell us, Ms. Culpa, how many White House aides, Republican congress members and sketchy acquaintances were seeking pardons in the final days of Mr. Trump’s term?

Culpa: We had a line stretching down Pennsylvania Avenue for about a mile. Wait times were approximately 18 hours. And those were just the suspected felons. We had a separate line for misdemeanors.

Thompson: And what was President Trump’s reaction to his aides waiting for hours in a mile-long line to seek forgiveness for crimes he ordered them to commit?

Culpa: He saw it as a good opportunity to sell them pizzas at an inflated price.

Thompson: Now let’s turn to our next witness, Ivanka Trump. She will be questioned by Rep. Liz Cheney of Wyoming.

Cheney: Ivanka, at any time between Nov. 3 and the present, have you tried to get your father to stop subverting democracy?

Ivanka: I did urge him to consider his legacy. To think of how history would judge him.

Cheney: And his reaction?

Ivanka: He said history is outdated — it’s all about TV ratings and social media followers now.

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Thompson: And now we will hear once again from William Barr, former attorney general. Mr. Barr, you’ve said it before but doggone it, I just want to hear it again. Tell us how far out of touch Trump was with reality.

Barr: It’s hard to describe, Mr. Chairman.

Thompson: Was it like, say, the distance from the North Pole to the South Pole?

Barr: Much too conservative.

Thompson: From here to the moon?

Barr: A vast underestimation of the president’s delusions.

Thompson: From Earth to galaxy HD1, thought to be an an astounding 13.5 billion light years away?

Barr: You’re getting warmer.

Thompson: And on that note, I’ll end this hearing. Good night and God save us.

Joe Blundo is a Dispatch columnist.

joe.blundo@gmail.com’

@joeblundo

****

Yes, God save us.

kommonsentsjane

About kommonsentsjane

Enjoys sports and all kinds of music, especially dance music. Playing the keyboard and piano are favorites. Family and friends are very important.
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